Review: Glossier Cloud Paint

OK, truth time: I don’t go out into the sun much. Like ever. Also, my standard skin colourĀ can be described as pasty. I don’t tan, I burn, and I don’t do much exercise. Still, since a few days, I have been sporting a beautiful flush on my face a la “I have frolicked in the meadows in a pretty dress and my hair fluttering in the wind. In reality, there has been no frolicking, you won’t catch me dead in a dress and my hair hasn’t done much fluttering since forever. “But why, Freddy, do you look like you’ve come straight out of a Jane Austen novel,” you ask. Come closer, dear reader, and let me blow your mind. You too can look prettily flushed, like the only worry in your life is whether or not you’ll find a husband with 10 000 a year. All for the price of one paltry Cloud Paint.

Yes, go forth my sisters and dab some colour on your cheeks, because theĀ Glossier Cloud Paint in Dusk is gonna chisel those cheekbones, rouge, flush and liven up your cheeks.

I have never frolicked in fields, because fuck those bugs and fuck the sun, but I look like I have and I fucking love it. This winter, my look will be the delightful perky heroine with alabaster skin (Lord, please give me good skin) and rosy cheeks (thanks, Glossier), whose wardrobe just happens to be 100% black. Or maybe I’ll just look like a freshly fed vampire. Doesn’t matter, I look like I got some exercise in, my mom will be so proud!

TL;DR: get your hands on Glossier Cloud Paint in Dusk, so you too can look like you don’t sit in front of a screen all day!

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